Why the smartest people have the toughest time dating
The writing of the books was precipitated by the endemic dating woes on the Harvard campus, as I observed them as an advisor and earlier, indulged in them as a student.Those kids graduate and pretty much continue to have the same dating woes — only now with fewer single people around who happen to live in the same building and share meals with them every day.And it certainly won’t bring you lasting love and fulfillment.Here’s the thing: your romantic success has nothing to do with your mental jewelry and everything to do with how you make the other person feel.Sadly, no mom, dad or professor teaches us about the power of the well-placed compliment (or put-down), giving attention but not too much attention, being caring without being needy.I wrote a whole 280-page book about that, so that’s a story for a different day.
And smart families are usually achievement-oriented. The upshot of all that achievement is that you get into a top college — congratulations!
Energy flows between positive and negative electrodes, anode and cathode, magnetic north and south.
Unless you actually convey femininity as a woman or masculinity as a man, you’re not going to attract a suitable companion of the opposite sex.
I know people in their 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond who still haven’t figured out how to create an intimate connection with another human being.
For most of their lives, smart people inhabit a seemingly meritocratic universe: if they work hard, they get good results (or, in the case of really smart folks, even if they don’t work hard, they still get good results).